Sardar Jokes

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:50 am Post subject: Sardar Jokes

Santa Sing at the examination Center:

Santa Singh stares at the examination paper for 5 Minutes & starts removing his clothes.

The examiner alarmed, approaches him and asks �What is going on??.

"Oye, I am only following the instructions yaar," he says,"

�Answer the following questions in brief�.

Hope u guys all liked it very much

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:51 am Post subject: Banta Singh

Banta Singh, coming back from a late night movie was attacked by a thief. There was a terrific fight and Banta gave a good account for himself. But finally the thief tied him down and went through his pockets.
He found only 25 Paisa.
The exasperated robber exclaimed "What the hell.
Why were you fighting for only 25 Paisa"
Banta replied "Oh. You were only after this 25 paise is it ? I thought you were after the Rs.1,000 I have hidden in my left shoe".

Surprised

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:52 am Post subject: Brain Selling Center

In a brain selling centre, most brains were available for sums ranging from Rs. 1,000 to Rs. 1,00,000.
But one Sardar Ji's brain was being quoted at over a Million dollars.
Why is it??? asked somebody.
Well! A Sardar Ji's brain is very rare and we can get only one in about a million heads, came the reply.

Very Happy

abhifrancis

Q: Why did the Sardarji stare at the frozen Orange
Juice Can for 2 hours?
A: Because it said 'concentrate'.

Q: A Sardarji going to London on a plane, how can
you steal his window seat?
A: Tell him the seats that are going to London are
all in the middle row

Q: How do you keep a Sardarji busy?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece
of paper.

Q: What do you call a Sardarji with half a brain?
A: Gifted!

Q: Some one asked if a Sardarji believed in smoking.
A: He said "Yes, I've seen it done."

Q: What will a Sardarji do after taking photocopies?
A: He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes !!

Idea

abhifrancis

Once a Sardarji worked very hard and was relaxing in chair.
After some time a known woman passing by asked him: Are you relaxing??? Then Sardarji replied her that i am not Relaxing, but i am Buta Singh, and again another woman having some work with him came to him and asked him: "Sir, are you relaxing???" again he told i am not Relaxing i am Buta Singh
After some time his personal secretary came to him and
She asked him: Sir are you relaxing and again he shouted and told her that he is not Relaxing and told that he is Buta Singh.
After some time a Sardarji was standing in front of him relaxing himself on the corner. Buta Singh saw him and asked him are you relaxing. He told that yes i am relaxing. Then, Buta Singh got up from his chair and slapped him and told some three woman were inquiring for you and left the place.

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:59 am Post subject: Last word in hospital

Santa Singh was in the hospital, nearing death, so the family called Banta to see his friend. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, Santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then Santa died. Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped
it into his jacket pocket. After the funeral, Banta singh was visiting Santa's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"

Special instruction: Don't laugh so loudly guys

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:02 pm Post subject: Why do a Sardar do these...????

Sardar ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he
should cut it in six or twelve pieces.
"Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."

Why did 18 sardarjis go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.

How do you measure a Sardar's intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear

What do you do when a Sardar throws a pin at you?
Run like Hell....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.

How do you make a Sardar laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

What is the Sardar doing when he holds his hands
tightly over his ears?
Trying to hold on to a thought.

Why can't Sardars make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipe.

How did the Sardar try to kill the bird?
He threw it off a cliff.

What do you call 10 Sardars standing ear to ear?
A wind tunnel

What do you see when you look into a Sardar's eyes?
The back of his head.

Laughing

abhifrancis

What do you do when a Sardar throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.

What do you call a sardar who drinks only beer?
Just-beer Singh ('T' silent!).

What do you call a sardar who has only one drink?
Just-one Singh.

Why does Sardar always smile during lightning
storms?
They think their picture is being taken.

Why does Sardar have "TGIF" written on their
shoes?
Toes Go In First.

How can you tell when Sardar sends you a fax?
It has a stamp on it.

Why can't Sardar dial 911?
They can not find the eleven on the phone

How do you get Sardar on the roof?
Tell him the drinks are on the house.

"Oh, look at the dead bird."
Sardar looked skyward and said "Where, Where?

What do smart Sardar and UFOs have in common?
You always hear about them but you never see
them.

Why does it take longer to build a Sardar snowman
as opposed to a regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.

How can you confuse a Sardarji?
By asking him to find the corner of a circle!
how will he confuse you?
By finding one!

Rolling Eyes

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:07 pm Post subject: Sardarji in plane

Once, a Hindu, a Sardar, and an American were traveling in an aeroplane. Suddenly, something went wrong and the engines stalled. They had no parachutes with them. So all the three of them decided to risk their lives and jump out of their planes. First, the Sardar jumped out. He removed his turban, used it as a parachute and jumped. Using the turban he slowly floated down. Then the Hindu removed his dhoti and jumped out. Again his dhoti acted as a parachute and he also floated down gently. Seeing this, the American removed his shirt and pant and jumped out. Unfortunately, they did not do well as a parachute and he began to fall rapidly from the plane to the ground. He passed by the Hindu who said - "May God help you". Then he passed the Sardar. The Sardar looked at the American zooming past him and was puzzled. So he said - "I see! You want a race! Let us see who is faster" Saying so, he let go of his turban.

abhifrancis · Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:09 pm Post subject: Sardar in train

Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave
the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up
when the Station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for
20 rupees, the Sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji
fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station
arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home,
he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the
mirror. Said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on
the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"

Rolling Eyes