Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:51 am Post subject: Banta Singh
Banta Singh, coming back from a late night movie was attacked by a thief. There was a terrific fight and Banta gave a good account for himself. But finally the thief tied him down and went through his pockets.
He found only 25 Paisa.
The exasperated robber exclaimed "What the hell.
Why were you fighting for only 25 Paisa"
Banta replied "Oh. You were only after this 25 paise is it ? I thought you were after the Rs.1,000 I have hidden in my left shoe".
Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:52 am Post subject: Brain Selling Center
In a brain selling centre, most brains were available for sums ranging from Rs. 1,000 to Rs. 1,00,000.
But one Sardar Ji's brain was being quoted at over a Million dollars.
Why is it??? asked somebody.
Well! A Sardar Ji's brain is very rare and we can get only one in about a million heads, came the reply.
Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:56 am Post subject: Hey Sardarji.......r u relaxing.....?????
Once a Sardarji worked very hard and was relaxing in chair.
After some time a known woman passing by asked him: Are you relaxing??? Then Sardarji replied her that i am not Relaxing, but i am Buta Singh, and again another woman having some work with him came to him and asked him: "Sir, are you relaxing???" again he told i am not Relaxing i am Buta Singh
After some time his personal secretary came to him and
She asked him: Sir are you relaxing and again he shouted and told her that he is not Relaxing and told that he is Buta Singh.
After some time a Sardarji was standing in front of him relaxing himself on the corner. Buta Singh saw him and asked him are you relaxing. He told that yes i am relaxing. Then, Buta Singh got up from his chair and slapped him and told some three woman were inquiring for you and left the place.
Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 11:59 am Post subject: Last word in hospital
Santa Singh was in the hospital, nearing death, so the family called Banta to see his friend. As Banta singh stood beside the bed, Santa Singh's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Banta singh lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Santa used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note. Then Santa died. Banta singh thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped
it into his jacket pocket. After the funeral, Banta singh was visiting Santa's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Santa died. "You know," he said, "Santa handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing Santa, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're standing on my oxygen tube!"
Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:07 pm Post subject: Sardarji in plane
Once, a Hindu, a Sardar, and an American were traveling in an aeroplane. Suddenly, something went wrong and the engines stalled. They had no parachutes with them. So all the three of them decided to risk their lives and jump out of their planes. First, the Sardar jumped out. He removed his turban, used it as a parachute and jumped. Using the turban he slowly floated down. Then the Hindu removed his dhoti and jumped out. Again his dhoti acted as a parachute and he also floated down gently. Seeing this, the American removed his shirt and pant and jumped out. Unfortunately, they did not do well as a parachute and he began to fall rapidly from the plane to the ground. He passed by the Hindu who said - "May God help you". Then he passed the Sardar. The Sardar looked at the American zooming past him and was puzzled. So he said - "I see! You want a race! Let us see who is faster" Saying so, he let go of his turban.
Posted: Wed Aug 11, 2004 12:09 pm Post subject: Sardar in train
Once a Sardarji was travelling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave
the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up
when the Station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for
20 rupees, the Sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji
fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station
arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home,
he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the
mirror. Said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on
the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"
Mr A and Mr. B were discussing how they would like to die. Mr. A said, "When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep. I don't want to die screaming like some of his friends, who also died at the same time." Mr. B asked, "How did his friends die screaming while your grandfather died sleeping peacefully?" Mr A replied, "His friends were the passengers in the car he was driving
ANOTHER COUNT!
Our Sardar is walking down the street and sees a man jumping up and down on a manhole cover yelling "86, 86, 86". He asks the man, "Excuse me, but why are you jumping up and down on this manhole cover and yelling '86, 86, 86'?" The man says, "Well, I can't tell you that, but if you really want to know, I can let you go under there and findout. He thinks for a moment, then his curiosity gets the better of him, and he says, "Okay." The man lifts the manhole cover, He steps into the manhole, and the man puts the manhole cover back and starts jumping up and down on it yelling "87, 87, 87"...
TO LOOSE WEIGHT...
The doctor told Sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, Sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem. "What's the problem?"asked the doctor. "I'm 2400 kms from home
Once in the Indo Pakistan war, Pakistan was fighting fiercely and capturing everything in sight. A sikh camp called Gurudwara hideout was crucial to defend from the pakistanis as it contained all the defence secrets. The pakistani forces surrounded the base and the sikhs had thought that they had lost the battle but, suddenly out of the bushes jumps Cptn. Hari Singh wearing a Maachar dani! (mosquito net) He Pulls out his AK-47 rifle and fires like mad. The pakistanis run off quickly. The next day Hari Singh gets a medal. His freinds ask him "Yaar thu maachar daani kyon pehenke gaya tha?" Hari Singh replies "Maachar daani itni patli hote hain ki agar maachar nahin ghus sakte, goli kahan se ghussenghi? In the following war Hari Singh retires and his son Gani Singh (No Assumptions Please!) joins the army. Pakistanis are again surrounding the Gurudwara hideout, the sikhs again think they've lost the war but out of the bushes erupts Gani Singh wearning nothing he tries do shoo away the pakistanis like his father did but instead gets shot. In the hospital his friends tell him "aare yaar, therre bap me tho itni akal thi ki vo maachar daani pehin ke gaya tha, aur tu nunga chale gaya" Gani Singh replies "aare yaar main tho odomos lage e gaya tha"!
Register
Log in
Malluwood
